Ombudsman Services: Michael Gove The Brains Behind Cuckoo Conservatism. (455)

To The Business Secretary:
For Clarity - Attempt 455.

455) Mr Gove - The Brains Behind Cuckoo Conservatism.

Dear Mr Javid,
Michael Gove, the Justice Minister and First Cuckoo in Spring has chirruped again. Only this time he's denying it. We, at The Campaign, have already said he couldn't possibly have been one of The Sun's, two, "impeccable sources" - and thus dissed Her Majesty (GBH)  - as there's nothing about him that's remotely impeccable.

The Ministry of Justice's website announces to the public that;
"We work to protect the public and reduce re-offending."
Surely, you don't needs the brains of an archbishop to know that one way of protecting the public and reducing re-offending would have been for the Prime Minister to have put Mr Gove - a known serial repeat offender - elsewhere. The Scrubs perhaps?  What a cuckoo idea of David Cameron's it was to let him nest at Justice Department. Yet another criminal error of judgement on his part. Seems he has cuckoo tendencies of his own.

Perhaps its contagious? Cuckoo flu?

Mr Gove is indeed like the cuckoo in the clock only instead of popping in out on the hour, he's in and out all the bloody time. His mechanism needs fixing. He's undoubtedly the First Among Cuckoos. The first cuckoo not only in spring but in summer, autumn and winter too. Busy ruffling the feathers of all around him. And worse. Cuckoos have a dark, destructive side. Bullying and attack dogs at, of all places, the Education Department. (www.independent.co.uk:
"Dump f***ing everyone - the inside story of how Mr Gove's vicious attack dogs are terrorising the DfE")

Come to think of it, Mr Gove, as the rising star of the cuckoo conservative right - The Cuckoo Ascending - should have had Big Ben specially adapted for him and he could have sprung out and chimed at regular intervals.

Foreign tourists would have loved him and he would have loved being seem regularly. He'd be famous and seen and heard every 15 minutes of every day!

But we suppose that would have involved an unacceptable degree of regulation and so another great opportunity to add something tangible and meaningful to the Big Society has once again been allowed to go begging.

Q. Mr Javid, as that other rising star of cuckoo conservatism, was it not a cuckoo idea to give a failed regulator, The RICS, total control over Ombudsman Services:Property - a private redress scheme criminally maladministers consumers' complaint in the name of, "civil justice?"

Yours sincerely,
Steve Gilbert - The Ombudsmans61percent Campaign.